


An Opportunity for Wisdom

by Laurasauras



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, Wisdom Teeth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-07
Updated: 2019-03-07
Packaged: 2019-11-13 09:12:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18028943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laurasauras/pseuds/Laurasauras
Summary: From Tumblr:notedchampagne:somebody please please please write a fanfic where dave gets his wisdom teeth taken out and is loony af on painkillers or morphine or whatever the dentists give you to completely remove your mental filter on saying anything and like, just have him stare at karkat as he walks in the room like so was the operation successful? have you been rid of your excessive enamel? and dave just points at karkat in awe like whoa whoooo tf is THIS cutie right here? why is he in here roxy. his hair is so fluffy do you think hell let me touch it is he like, famous he really does have the face for it dont you think and roxys like thats your boyfriend :3 and cut to dave going through a drug-induced awe mindsplosion while karkat gets increasingly embarrassed about dave just. lavishing comments on him. john takes a videovriskerly-serket:bonus points if dave and karkat arent even dating yet





	An Opportunity for Wisdom

**Author's Note:**

  * For [apocalypticTaco](https://archiveofourown.org/users/apocalypticTaco/gifts).



> I wrote this real fast, please excuse any mistakes!

There’s not much on this planet that could make you remotely inconvenience yourself in the name of Dave fucking Strider, but when Roxy sends a group text message letting everyone know that he’s fine, but tripping balls, you know that you have to get yourself to her place immediately. Not because you’re concerned, but because you’re usually the kind of asshole that feels the need to check up on his friends, and that provides you with the perfect excuse to take advantage of the situation. 

Almost ten years ago, when you were still under the mistaken impression that Dave was a one-note asshole that thought he was God’s gift to the world, he’d found out that your middle name is Eugene and spent six fucking weeks tormenting you about it. He wrote songs about it. He  _ performed _ songs about it. You really hated him back then.

You don’t hate him now. You’re adults, you’ve had enough friends in common for enough years that you’ve gotten to know him and he’s a good guy. But you still don’t know his middle name, and his insufferable sister has let slip that it’s  _ really  _ bad. So you’re absolutely going to take advantage of his intoxicated state to find out once and for all. 

You’re a little bit giddy on the drive over. Dave doesn’t even drink, you’ve never seen him in a situation where he hasn’t looked in control. He parties, but he’s the one keeping an eye out for creepy guys and driving people home. Stupid responsible friend swooping in like he thinks he’s gotta protect everyone. You’re really looking forward to fussing over the one guy who you’ve never been able to fuss over. And finding out his closest secret.

You get to Roxy’s house and ring the doorbell. Roxy answers, a huge smile on her face. She grabs you by the shoulders and jumps up and down. Her curls bounce crazily in her face and she shakes them out again, grinning.

‘Karkat, oh-my-gawd, this is the best day ever!’

‘Your brother just underwent surgery,’ you point out.

‘It went fine! The surgeon even gave me his teeth to keep!’

‘Why the fuck—’

‘He’s  _ soooo _ high, Kat! Like, oh-my-god, you have no idea. That dude is like if high were a chick, he’d be mackin’ on with her real bad.’

‘You’re ridiculous,’ you say, trying and failing to let her innate Roxyness soften your concerned face (which is basically just your angry face, which might be your default face). You shove past her and enter the room, still pretending that your motives are entirely pure. She follows you back in, whispering that him seeing new people is the best part. 

She takes your arm before you need to ask where he is and guides you to what must be Dave’s room. It’s almost as tidy as yours, and normally you’d be taking advantage of the situation to scope out his decorating preferences, but your attention is pretty focused on Dave, leaning on John with his whole body despite being next to each other in bed.

John looks up from his phone when you come through the door and gives you a cheery wave. It takes Dave a few seconds to direct his gaze towards you. 

You don’t know what you were expecting, bruises maybe? But he mostly looks unfocused and young, probably because his signature shades are resting on his bedside table instead of his nose. Roxy hops onto the end of the bed and pats a spot for you, but you’re having some kind of staring malfunction.

‘So I assume you’re fine,’ you say. ‘The surgeon didn’t take out your spleen along with your excessive enamel or anything?’

Dave blinks slowly at you before turning to Roxy.

‘Rox,’ he stage whispers. ‘Whoooo is this movie star in my bedroom right now.’

‘Movie star?’ you repeat, confused as all fuck.

‘That’s your bee-eff, baby!’ Roxy says, winking.

‘What?’ you say in alarm, but Dave’s talking and you can’t talk over him.

‘Woah!’ he slurs. ‘You’re my boyfriend? Holy shit!’

John laughs and you realise he has his phone pointed at Dave. He spins it to you and you hold up your middle finger and scowl.

‘But he’s so hot!’ Dave says. ‘His … hair …’

‘What about his hair, Davey?’ Roxy asks.

‘It so  _ fluffy _ ,’ he whines. ‘Roxy, do you think … do you think he’ll let me touch his hair?’

‘Karkat wouldn’t deprive his love of hair pets when he’s being so brave after his surgery, would you Karkat?’ John says.

‘Woah!’ Dave says. ‘He loves me? I’m so fuckin’ lucky, oh fuck, do I love him?’

You make an awkward protesting noise that goes completely ignored.

‘’Course you do, honey!’

‘I’m going to kill you,’ you tell Roxy.

‘Yeah,’ Dave says, but you’re pretty sure he’s agreeing more with Roxy than you. ‘’Course. ‘Cause he’s so beautiful. And probably has many other … um … agreeable qualities.’ He lapses into thought, just staring at you for a bit, and then shouts, ‘ARGH!’ all of a sudden and you all jump. ‘You’re too pretty!’ he cries, almost as loudly as his shout. 

Okay, you’re blushing enough for it to be obvious now. You don’t blush! This is incredible bullshit.

‘You’re like … a beautiful brown angel,’ he groans.

‘Dude,’ John protests. 

‘What, the race-based compliment is too far?’ you ask scathingly. 

‘I’m gonna put you in a movie,’ Dave says, interrupting whatever John’s reply might have been. ‘You’re gonna be my leading lady but a boy. My leading boy. Gonna lead you to famous. Unless you’re already famous. Are you famous? You have a famous face, look at your  _ lips _ , oh-fuck-me-upside-down-on-a-merry-go-round, have we kissed?’

You have to hide your face, you can’t deal with this. You can’t even shout at him, he’s too vulnerable, why are you even here?

Oh, right.

‘What’s your middle name?’ you blurt out.

‘Dave,’ Dave replies. ‘Oh shit! That’s my normal name!’ He starts to laugh. 

You groan and crouch on the floor on your toes. A moment later you jump at the feeling of Roxy’s hand patting you on your shoulder. You peek out from where you’ve hidden your face behind your arms. 

‘He’ll be back to normal soon enough,’ she murmurs. Dave has started rambling about the movie again, but you both ignore him. ‘I didn’t think he’d run with it this much, you’re okay though, right?’

You groan in response and she just pats your arm again. 

‘Hey, hey Roxy!’ Dave calls. ‘That’s my boyfriend! Don’t steal him!’

You look up at Dave’s bed, where he’s trying to get up while John tries to hold him back. 

‘Karkat, a little help?’ John says. 

You climb onto the bed and Dave stops struggling. His face breaks into a genuine smile, one of the few you’ve seen from him and the first you’ve seen without his shades obstructing the view. Your heart lurches ridiculously in your chest. Well fuck, so much for being over this crush. 

Dave takes your hand almost shyly and you have to look away to hide how much this is affecting you. Your avoidance makes you look at John instead, and he looks delighted. At least he’s stopped recording at some point.

‘I like your hands,’ Dave whispers, just as loudly as if he had’ve spoken normally.

‘Uh … yeah. Yours are nice too.’

His eyes crinkle in a very nice way when he smiles. 

‘Where are you from?’ he asks.

‘Connecticut, asshole,’ you say, just like you told him when you first met. This time you don’t make him work for your heritage. ‘My parents are from the Philippines.’

‘Is everyone from the Philippines so pretty?’

‘You’re an idiot,’ you tell him.

He just smiles at you again. 

*

It’s a week before you see Dave again. In that time, John’s video circulates not only through your friends, but it also spreads online. You hole yourself up in your room and pretend that you can’t see any of it. 

When you see him, it’s not voluntary. Sollux lets him in. You meet his eyes and briefly consider pretending to be asleep in your desk chair. 

‘Yo,’ Dave says.

‘How are your teeth?’ you blurt. 

‘So, you’ve seen the video. And also were there. While not on extreme mind-altering, filter-destroying, memory-compromising painkillers. So, like, you know what happened.’

You sigh and stare at your mouse. 

‘You were really high. I know you didn’t mean it. This doesn’t have to be a thing.’

He takes a step towards you and then stops awkwardly. 

‘Uh, yeah, no I know that. But it could be a thing?’

Your heart starts pounding faster as you look up at him. He looks almost nervous, but you’ve never seen him nervous before, Dave doesn’t get nervous. He’s always in control.

‘What do you mean?’ you ask slowly.

‘I mean shit, Kat, that didn’t come from nowhere! I’m not saying I think you have a future as Hollywood’s next great thing or anything, but the whole “I find you cute” thing is kind of out of the bag. Out and proud, participating in parades and pioneering fashion trends.’

You stare at him. You can feel your mouth slightly open but you don’t have the ability to fix that. He’s not really …

‘I mean, I get it if you don’t want to. I’m just saying that it could be a thing. I like you, I’ve liked you for, like, ever. And I know that you’re that special brand of Vantas mean but really nice to everyone, but … Look, can you let me off the hook here or what?’

‘You want to go out?’

‘Yeah,’ he says, and his whole body drops a few measures of tension like he didn’t think to just ask normally and he’s relieved you get it.

‘What’s your middle name?’ you ask.

He winces. 

‘Goddammit Karkat, I’m already the one putting myself out here, I’m the one who got high and made a fool of myself, you don’t need another edge—’

‘Strider.’

‘Elizabeth,’ he mutters.

‘No way.’

‘Names technically aren’t gendered,’ he says. ‘They’re just noises you make to get someone’s attention, and middle names are even more stupid because I’ve never run into another Dave Strider, I need a middle name like I need a cactus up my ass.’

You stand up out of your desk chair and take a nervous step towards him. He shuts up. You watch as he swallows. 

You fist your hand in his t-shirt and pull him roughly towards you so you can kiss him. He wraps his arms around you and lifts you slightly off the ground without breaking the kiss. 

‘Yes?’ he says. 

‘Yeah,’ you say. 


End file.
